Nancy

There were the bad news. Of Nancy. Who won't be around to say hi any more.

It's such a strange thing. Seeing her still in my friends list, knowing she won't reply if I IM. And seeing all her friends already missing her so. Not to mention the one who was more than just her friend. Poor pet.

I didn't know her as well as they all did, really. Oh, she first brought me to the girl's club. For that I'll be grateful forever. But I still feel it inside. Much. For her. For them.

Lost

I went to Fish's garden, or rather meant to go there, but had lost the landmark and couldn't. I had been hoping to see Fishie, because I haven't seen her in a while now. I wanted to, but couldn't. So, I'm not just emotionally unstable, but also not very good at keeping things I've been given. Like LM's. Or jobs.

I don't really care much for the genets. Right now I want Fish.

Garden

Would I seem emotionally unstable if I said I'm quite pleased? Because I am. I am allright again. After Fishie invited me to her place to dance. The kind of dancing you do just for fun, that is. And after mentioning to her that I wasn't really cool with the dungeon they've built in the spotted girl club, she took me to see what she has built herself. A lovely garden! It has trees, and flowers, plants hanging from the ceiling, a camp fire, sparkling pools, and lots of other nice things. I loved it! And then she said I could come there as often as I like... she's so sweet!

Yes, she is.

I've also been to one of the Africas, to look for nocturnal animals. Like genets, and aardvarks. But there were none, at least I didn't see any, despite staying there for quite some time. Maybe the genets don't find enough to eat there, because there are so few insects. Or maybe avatars visiting keep changing the time of day settings a lot, switching between night and day all the time and making the genets all confused.

I have to come back, though. I'd really like to see the genets.

Not

No. I'm not allright.

I hate this. Stupid Mia, making me quit a job that I liked a lot. And leave the friends I loved.

I hate this. It's like being discontinued. What's there for me to do now? From now on? Ever?

Allright

I went to the club tonight, for the first time in a long time. Only this time I came to have fun, not to work. I felt weird for a start, coming back to my old job like that, but Mandy and Flann, who still work there, were so sweet to me and hugged me and said I was welcome, so everything was fine from then on. And the music that Flann plays is still good. There is a new dancer now, doing what I used to do, and she's really good looking and nice, and is probably going to earn lots and lots of tips. She's taking her clothes off, too, which I was glad to see, because that means I hadn't misunderstood things and was undressing when I shouldn't.

So I feel allright again. I'm not miserable any more. I can go to the club and see my friends whenever they're working. And maybe when they're not working, too.

No no no!

What have I done!?

Oh no no no!

I'm not working in the club any more. I, stupid Serval, said I can't do it any more. And retired. Left. Quit. After a last shift, an 80's event. Oh, I was in such a good mood, had fun dancing and talking with the others. The event just rushed away, and was all of a sudden over. Then the girls came to see me off. They came to hug me. They said so many nice things to me. It dawned upon me that I was not going to be one of them any more. And that they are the sweetest avatars that I've ever met.

I had felt like blubbering already during the event, when Flann played a special song, just for me.

What have I done!

It seemed the obvious thing to do, giving up the dancing. Because Mia has seemed stressed lately, and I think the spotted girl club in some way was the reason for that. I don't know why, as it wasn't she that had to go there to work. But she's not very stable, I think, and something made her worry. So I had no choice, really. I said not a very long time ago that I'll take care of her, and make her feel fine. So quitting was for Mia. Doing it for her felt good. I just hadn't expected to miss the other girls so much even before leaving them.

Now I'm miserable. Because the world seems like a big black empty hole. I'm feeling myself what I've sensed from Mia before. It's exactly the same.