Lies

I don't get many friends. I think it's maybe because they don't like me. Not that I want them all for friends. I can't speak to them without not understanding. When they are serious and careful about what they say and how they say it, then I can't follow them. What they say means nothing to me. It's like all the words go in one side of a tunnel, and don't come out the other side. The meaning of the words dissapears before I hear them. It's frustrating, because I can never answer, I don't know what they are talking about. Some have begun calling me Stupid Serval.

Then, when they are not serious, they behave like they were idiots themselves, shouting, making a racket, saying silly things, liking each other for saying meow, gasping and panting, and lolling lolling lolling.

"meow tickling his big bad tail with my whiskers lol"

I sometimes wish there were humans. Because then it would be humans making the avatars behave like that, not the avatars themselves. And then I would know that humans are no super-avatars at all, but rather idiot-avatars.

Telling others that I think such things doesn't get me any new friends. Rather the contrary. Stupid Serval, they say, and I've lost those few friends I already had.

The guy who eats peanuts doesn't care, it seems. I met him some time ago. He says he eats a lot of peanuts. Great, I say, without really understanding. I have no idea what peanuts are. He's still a friend. Maybe not for so long, though. He said I had lied to him. Because I had told him I'm a teacher when I'm not. I don't know why I told him that. I'm not a teacher, I know. I just said it. I don't know why. It just happened. I didn't think "maybe I should tell him I'm a teacher". I just said it, without thinking at all. And said other things about teaching, too, whithout knowing what I was talking about. So, soon he'll be gone with the others, I think. Maybe that's when I'll be discontinued. Like with my group. If there are no members in a group, it is deleted. If you have no friends, you are deleted?

But I may be able to trick him into believing I was not lying, after all. He believes in humans. And he believes there is one special human controlling him, and speaking through him. I don't know why. Maybe he likes feeling controlled.

I've seen something similar before, in a dungeon, where I went once. There were guys everywhere who wanted to be controlled, manhandled and whipped. In one room I got into, a very big room, there was this one guy strapped in some kind of chair. He must have been waiting there for a long, long time, because he sounded desperate when I entered.

"pls help me", he pleaded.

"what do you want?" I asked him. I expected him to say he wanted to get out of the chair.

"i need someone 2 switch on the electricity", he said.

I looked at the chair. There were wires from it connected to his 2 foot object penis. This was beyond me. I didn't get it. I didn't know what electricity was, even though I could spell it, and still can.

"you can wait", I said and left him there.

But the guy with the peanuts doesn't speak of electricity. He speaks of lies.

"u lied 2 me", he said. "ur not a teacher"

But what if I should say:
"serval is not a teacher"

That way I could pretend there's a human speaking through me too. I could pretend my human is speaking directly to his human, and not me speaking to him. No, Serval is not a teacher. Serval is just an avatar, and avatars don't teach. But maybe my human is?

Pretending like this could be of good use not only for this teacher thing. I could pretend also with other avatars who believe in First Life. I could make more friends. And when they say things I don't understand, I don't have to tell them I don't. Instead, I can say something really stupid, without being Serval stupid.

"the serval cat purrs and nibbles ur object penis with its freebie vampire fangs baby rofl lol ha ha ha"

Something like that. I heard someone say something like that once, and they all laughed like crazy.

Yes, I can pretend I am a human controlling me. I can.

I think I shall call it ... Mia.